time management

Maybe I’m just impatient. I think that’s why I’m not as loving a mom as I could be. Either way, Noah had a project yesterday and it drove me crazy.

He had to create a poster for the Cub Scout Pack meeting we had last night. We both knew about it weeks in advance. And I was prepared. I had the poster board and on the way home from school at 2 pm I told Noah that he needed to stay on track and finish his homework quickly so that he could have time for making the poster before the event at 5:30 pm.

Staying on track. sigh. Not one of his strong suites. Or Liam’s either. As soon as we walked in the door from school, I went upstairs and put Ray down for a nap. I was gone from Noah and Liam’s presence for about 5 minutes, maybe less. I came downstairs and found them on the floor, Noah had has arms locked around Liam’s neck, Liam was half laughing, half yelling and their things (backpacks, lunches, sweatshirts) were strewn across the room like someone had stood in the middle of the room and joyfully thrown everything as high as they could in the air. Total chaos …. how long as I gone??? I had to check, yep. Five minutes. In order to do this, they must’ve come inside and immediately gotten to work acting like maniacs.

We got them on track, putting away their things and …… PAUSE. I need to say something:

As I have been writing the past two paragraphs, things have fallen apart. It’s only 8:30 am and things are a disaster around here. I feel like this whole motherhood job requires one to be a certain kind of person, that I am not. Ya know how in job descriptions it says stuff like “self-motivated, Excel training a must” etc (I actually can’t even remember what job listings look like, but go with me here), I feel like motherhood has the requirement of being a morning person. A non-morning person cannot handle what needs to happen before 8 am. I get up at 7 am and that’s because Daniel has already gotten up with the boys at 6:30 am. I USED to get the boys up at 6:45 am but I couldn’t maintain that and it wasn’t enough time for them to get ready. It wasn’t enough time because they would get distracted and start playing with Legos. That’s why. We have to get them up 15 minutes earlier to account for their shenanigans. Anyway, 6:30 am??! I can’t handle that and be a happy person. So Daniel does it, but still. Being up at 7 am is not my bag baby. One of the reasons I struggle with motherhood is largely the sleep issue and the early mornings.

Beyond just being up (which is too much for me anyway) I have to deal with insane little creatures at 7 am. Reminding Noah and Liam what they should be doing, making lunches, making sure the boys don’t forget the basics (shoes, backpacks, lunches, water) but then I also have to make sure they’re prepared for tests for the day, homework in their bags and of course answer thoughtful questions Noah asks (he’s a morning person and his brain is awake and inquisitive at 7:15 am) and then I’m also keeping the boys from arguing. You might say, “you could cut out half of that by preparing the night before, by making lunches and checking backpacks”. Ahhhhh, yes, you’d think so. But last night was the scout thing that kept us out until bedtime and I was exhausted from yesterday’s events and went to bed at 9 pm! It’s one eternal round of prep work and reminders for these boys.

But things have fallen apart just while I’ve been writing. As I’ve been writing, I have had to get up 5 times to get things for Ray, who has decided that he’s no longer supposed to sit in his high chair, but he will now sit in the counter height chairs next to me, at the bar. He’s almost fallen out of the chair twice and he keeps yanking and leaning on my arms as I write. During the time I’ve been writing, Ray has also dropped an entire bowl of dry (thank heavens) cheerios on the floor. He’s also started walking all over the cheerios. So, during the time I’ve been writing, I’ve also had to stop and sweep the floor. During that time, Ray has been put in his high chair and he’s crying about that. He’s also started crying and asking for “more cheerios”. I told him they’re dirty because he dropped them all over the floor and he’s now mourning the loss. Crying and wailing in his high chair. Just while I’ve written the first two paragraphs.

But enough of that, back to time management. After much prodding, constant reminding and after finding both boys playing at 17 separate times and places, it was 4 pm and time to start the poster! I thought this would be the easy part. The homework part was hard enough. Just getting to this point was exhausting, now it was just time to write and draw a poster.

I read the description of what he needed to do: illustrate the Leave No Trace frontcountry guidelines. There were 6 guidelines. I left him to it and started working on things I was planning on doing for preschool on Friday at my house. I came to check on Noah 25 minutes later. The poster was empty and there he was, sharpening every last colored pencil and even some crayons (which are not supposed to go into the electric sharpener … but that’s another problem all together). I told him to stop sharpening and to get going on the poster. This time I stayed close, working on my project side by side Noah on the floor in the kitchen. I watched anxiously as he painstakingly used a ruler to write each letter of the first guideline: plan ahead. He spent probably another 15 minutes doing this.

Now, I am admittedly a bit of a control freak. Motherhood has only enhanced this issue because I feel like, “If I don’t do it, it won’t happen at all and we’ll be stuck up a creek without a paddle”. So, on projects like these, I try to stand back and let the chips fall where they may, to teach a lesson. But when it came down to the last half hour and Noah had nothing actually “illustrated” like the directions asked … I had to step in. I told him to divide 5 (the rest of the guidelines he had to illustrate) into 30 (the minutes he had left to accomplish this), he came up with 6. Six minutes per guideline. I had to time him from that point on. He’d ask how much time he had as he drew and I’d tell him. We did it. It was finished.

I never wanted to be one of those moms that “nagged” but man, nothing gets done. Speaking of nothing getting done ….. I gotta go.

pumpkin patch

Even in Southern California, where the fall season consists of 80 degree weather, there are fun fall-ish things to do – the pumpkin patch being one of them! There’s even a cider mill in the mountains that we went to last year that I plan on visiting in November when it cools down around here a little :)

We had never been to this pumpkin patch and it was super cool, but waaaaaaayy overpriced. Still. We let the boys pick one ting they wanted to do and they picked the zip line. It was awesome. Check out the pictures to see their little overjoyed faces. We had fresh squeezed strawberry lemonade, climbed and jumped all over a hay castle, listened to a live band, the boys did the zip line and we got Ray a tiny pumpkin. Ray is wild about pumpkins. He has been carrying his pumpkin around everywhere for the past 24 hours … until it finally busted open last night. Ray even took it to church yesterday. He would just hold it in one hand and sometimes give it a little hug. hilarious.












Little side note: at the end of the ride I asked the boys how it was and Noah said, “It was so crazy that at the end I almost yelled ‘Holy s-word’!” I asked him what’s the s-word and then he said the four letter word I was hoping he didn’t know. It was a growing moment. I realized that he wasn’t as naïve as I had hoped. He knows and hears things I wish he didn’t, but at the same moment I thought, “well, he knew it, he thought it and then decided not to say it.” Tiny victory I guess. Wow, my boys are so big. It’s scary. I wanted to protect them a little longer. It feels like times up.


This is right after the ride. Look at their glowing little boy faces. Just awesome. They were super pumped about it.

good day

Sometimes it’s just such a good day you have to make good “old fashioned clementine pound cake” to top it off :)

This morning Daniel took the boys to school. I love a day that starts with Ray and me waving goodbye to Daniel and the boys while still in our PJ’s. We went inside and promptly made a smoothie. Ray drank his smoothie while watching a Thomas show on Netflix while I drank mine while setting up the mantel. I recently redesigned the mantel with new black and white pictures and an aqua colored quote that says “Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured” by Gordon B. Hinckley. I love it.

I’ve been worried about making everything in the house earthquake proof, so today I tackled that. I secured the pictures on the mantel, then went into the boys’ room and secured the expedit bookcase to the wall and took glass out of frames. While I had the drill out …. I finally fixed the bathroom towel rack too! Ha! While in the bathroom … I gave Ray a much needed bath.

Then I decided I needed a break and laid down on my bed to look at pinterest. I found an awesome article by one of the general authorities and started reading about being meek and before I knew it, I had drifted into a cat nap. That is such a lovely thing to do. I only slept for about 20 minutes but to quietly drift into sleep while Ray played with trains next to me was a special kind of wonderful.

It was time to shower and sing. So I did. Showering is always awesome. I never take that for granted. I’ll bet at some point in my future life, I will take showers for granted … not now. A good day always includes a shower. Then I practiced singing. I have a performance coming up, so it was needed.

I had about ten minutes before I had to pick up Noah and Liam from school and I took that opportunity to look online for some piano books for Noah. I didn’t have much hope that I would find exactly what I was looking for … but then I did … and then I bought them … and they will be here in 2 days, before his next lesson. It was a total success.

When I picked up the boys from school I was bombarded with good news!! Liam said he got 100% on his math test that day and only 3 kids in his whooooooole class got 100%! Noah chimed in with news that he had just passed the next level of reading tests! I was so happy that we spent the rest of the ride home discussing which kind of cake we would make as a celebration.

We got home, put Ray down for a nap, and did homework. Noah finished all his chores in a flash, without any reminders and Liam finished his homework then helped me make the Old Fashioned Clementine Pound Cake. Liam finished his chores while I did dishes then the boys got to play computer games and I got a quiet 35 minutes to start cleaning the guest room. It wasn’t scrubbing the baseboards kind of cleaning, it was looking through old school papers and pictures kind of sorting and organizing type of cleaning. Full of memories and cute pictures. So delightful. Also, I don’t have to have the entire room ready for guests until this weekend, so I wasn’t crunched for time. It was leisurely and rewarding.

As I walked downstairs the air was full of smells of clementines, sugar and cinnamon – that right there will put you in a good mood.

It was 5 o’clock and time to get dinner on. We made homemade pizza. Ray was still babbling in his bed and the other boys were happily enthralled with Spiderman on TV, so I just took my time and made dough from scratch. Noah asked if he could help me cook and the boys both wanted to help. They were fighting over who could cook with me … how often does that happen??? I’ll tell you how often – never. But they were, so I had Noah help me make the sauce and roll out the dough. It was so pleasing to teach him how to fold the dough into 4ths to put it on the pizza pan, just like my mom taught me as a little girl. He giggled as he did it and said, “huh! So fourths?! I got it!”

I went upstairs and got Ray before he started crying and Liam jumped in and actually helped with Ray. Liam got him milk and played nicely with him while Noah and I finished up. Then Daniel walked in the door. I didn’t have to call and ask him if he was going to be super late. I wasn’t checking the clock. Daniel just called us on the way home and then came home. At a decent hour. BEFORE dinner. whaa?? Yeah. That kind of a day.

We ate together at the table, the boys shared their good news about what they’d accomplished at school and Ray ate his salad and showed everyone at the table that he could count to 4 (then he jumps to 7 and that’s the end). We finished off by downing some delicious clementine pound cake.

As I write, Liam and Ray are almost falling over giggling and trying to chase one another with a ball and each telling the other “that’s dangerous!” (about running). It’s funniest to hear Ray say so clearly, “that’s dangerous Leo!” (he calls Liam, “Leo”). Pure bliss.

I’m just going to finish this post, snuggle up on the couch with my lover and watch some good shows. It doesn’t happen all the time, but I guess that’s what makes this so sweet when it happens. Good day.

end of summer

Sooooo, it’s the last day of summer and tomorrow school starts … sort of. For some reason the school schedule here is retarded. For Wed, Thurs and Friday (the first 3 days of school) they are “minimum days” which means “we don’t really learn because we’re only in school for 10 minutes and of that 10 minutes 5 are spent in recess and at lunchtime”. Give me a break, if you’re going to start school, start it already! Don’t do 3 minimum days, just start 3 days later and do full blown school days. It’s almost not worth getting up at 6:45 am and getting the kids to school by 7:45 am, just to pick them up at 11:35 am! A waste, total waste. And don’t they know we moms are chomping at the bit to get these darn kids back into school??!

I don’t know how everyone else is doing, but I am fed up. I wonder some days what I was thinking when I decided to procreate. It doesn’t help that on this lovely last day of summer, my kids have been especially terrible. We’re going out with a bang here, by taking the car in to the dealership to get some recalls taken care of. Nothing worse than being in public, in a small room, waiting for hours for your car, with all of your children in close proximity to you. They said it would take 45 minutes, then 1.5 hours, then 2.5 hours after we were there the guy comes up to me and says, “I checked on your car and they said 10-15 more minutes and I even told them that you have all of your kids with you!” I had no sympathy or patience I just said, “yeah, whatever” and put both Liam and Noah on time out … for 10-15 minutes.

It’s not like there wasn’t stuff for the boys to do. They had an entire little room for children, with toys, seats, a magnetic wall, movies playing in Blu-ray and they even offered the boys snacks too! Granted, it was not a smart choice to give 3 boys chocolate muffins. There was chocolate on the floor in the children’s room and trailing out the door into the hallway for passersby to track everywhere with them. A little gift from me to them.

But a 20×20 room could not contain my boys, oh no. We decided to leave and take a walk after Ray started teetering on coffee tables outside of the children’s room and when I pulled him off, he fell to the floor (made it look like I pushed him too … total drama queen these days) and laid there in the hallway, face to the floor crying and kicking his feet. Thank you my little two year old. I picked him up, called for Liam and Noah to follow me and walked right out of the door and started down the street. We found a burger place within a few blocks and ate there for lunch …. also a bad idea.

I am beginning to think that there is no place for my children. They are wild, mean, ungrateful, loud creatures meant only for cages and the outdoors.

I thought getting some burgers in them would be good. I have to feed them right? Liam and Noah were ok, although, I can’t for the life of me get Noah to stop wandering around in large circles, knocking into people and things. Liam continues to say things too loud, whine and wander away in public places. My boys wander away from me everywhere – in stores, on sidewalks, in parking lots. Sometimes they just start walking towards the street or moving cars, with their heads down, staring at their own feet, mumbling. ??????! I have no words for this kind of behavior. It’s stupid and dangerous. I guess I do have words for this. Anyway, nothing more than the usual for Noah and Liam, but Ray was in rare form.

Ray has been in rare form for about 3 days now and I’m ready to sell him on craigslist. It’s pretty typical 2 year old behavior – yelling, “mine!” or “I do it!” or “NO!”, hitting, not sitting down anywhere at anytime, running away, throwing things, being wildly giddy then totally raving mad the next minute … it’s like they go insane for a year between 2-3 years old. Then their brain chemistry regulates and they act a little less mean.

Ray was doing all of this at the burger joint. He threw his drink on the floor and it burst everywhere, making a huge mess that the patrons had to step around and one slipped in (insert me apologizing and trying to mop up pink lemonade with 60 napkins while Ray keeps whining and yelling about his “deenk”). He refused to sit and when he finally did sit down to eat, he only ate fries, nothing else and then started pushing the stroller around, knocking into people and things. And while I’m playing defense on Ray, I look over at Noah and Liam, hoping they are close to done eating and I see them not eating anything, but staring out the window mindlessly. I had to snap them back into reality and set a fire under their buns to get eating or we’d leave and they’d be hungry. Finally, I had to go to the bathroom. So, I asked Noah and Liam to go to the bathroom and go potty and wash hands while I took Ray with me.

The bathrooms are right next to each other, so I could hear every bit of the shenanigans that was happening in the men’s bathroom. sigh. It just makes me tired thinking about it. Once outside of the burger place, I look over at the boys and they have ketchup and food all over their faces. Back into the bathroom to clean faces …

Once we walked back to the dealership I thought they would surely be done, since it had been 2 hours already and they had estimated 1.5 hours. Nope. We waited another 40 minutes before getting out. painful, just painful. And that was just half of the last day of summer. Right now I am listening to Ray, not sleeping, but yelling and crying from his room when he should be taking a nap. I WAS hearing banging and crashing about and yelps of pain from Liam and Noah until I put them on time out for the past 15 minutes. ugh. summer, just end already and get these unruly boys out of my house and learning, doing something useful! sheesh. And the fact is, they act waaaaaayyyyyy better for their teachers than they do for me, so get them out!


I started my period. TMI? Whatevs. My house is a bit of a disaster, I already showered, took kids to school, ran errands, hung out with Zacky and then Christina and put Ray down for a nap, so I feel like I can be done for the day and not feel bad about it. It’s noon.

I am on the committee that puts on the Relief Society activities/meetings. Last night we had an event and it was awesome. We had Patriarch Bascom come speak to us about the Book of Mormon. It was mind blowing. He talked about the editions of the Book of Mormon and why they came out and how the closer we get to the original words spoken from Joseph’s mouth, the better the text is; it is more clear and makes more and more sense with what scholars continue to discover about ancient times and texts. It was so exciting. Patriarch Bascom reminded me of my dad and Bro. Collette. He was so excited about the Book of Mormon and all of his studies about it. He was moved by words and passages. He found wonder and amazement at what it must have been like to be Joseph Smith, speaking out loud the words from 3 Nephi 11 for the first time in this dispensation –

5 And again the third time they did hear the voice, and did open their ears to hear it; and their eyes were towards the sound thereof; and they did look steadfastly towards heaven, from whence the sound came.

6 And behold, the third time they did understand the voice which they heard; and it said unto them:

7 Behold my Beloved Son, bin whom I am well pleased, in whom I have glorified my name—hear ye him.

8 And it came to pass, as they understood they cast their eyes up again towards heaven; and behold, they saw a Man descending out of heaven; and he was clothed in a white robe; and he came down and stood in the midst of them; and the eyes of the whole multitude were turned upon him, and they durst not open their mouths, even one to another, and wist not what it meant, for they thought it was an angel that had appeared unto them.

9 And it came to pass that he stretched forth his hand and spake unto the people, saying:

10 Behold, I am Jesus Christ, whom the prophets testified shall come into the world.

It was so powerful and such a testimony builder to listen to the Patriarch speak. He was animated too, just like Daddy. And he didn’t need to look at anything, no notes, no hiding behind a pulpit, he was so comfortable just discussing with us his findings. I loved every moment. I felt like clapping afterwards, but I guess that’s irreverent. I went up to him afterwards and chatted with him for a bit. He studied religion in college, majored in it and then taught high school history and later a high school religion course too. Such a fascinating person and an enlightening night. I love having time to educate and uplift myself all at once. Loved it, loved it.

Anyway, as a sidenote – we put together a “bread bar” to celebrate and mirror the sustenance we were given through Patriarch Bascom’s presentation. Give us our Daily Bread … through an awesome little bread bar. We had pita and naan bread with several different, yummy hummus dips. There was honey wheat, pumpkin, cinnamon raisin and jalepeno cheesy bread. All complete with butter, honey butter, jelly and olive oil and balsamic vinegar to dip everything in. We decorated the table with lavender, green potted plants and one basil plant.

Besides this, life is moving forward here in California. Today is a cloudy day, which is why I’m taking some time and spending it indoors to type away, but pretty much every day is a sunny day. It’s unbelievable. I was bummed out last Saturday because early in the week it said it would be 77 degrees at the beach, but it cooled to 71 and we decided against a beach day with such chilly weather …. I know. I smile even as I write this because most of the country is covered in snow, in February, and here I am bummed about 71. I’m not bummed. It’s gorgeous.

I realized that I never really documented Ray’s first word. I’m pretty sure it was DADA, because he loooooves Daddy. But Ray went from grunting to saying like 4 words all at once, so It’s hard to say. But here’s a list of what little Ray is communicating these days:

Woh-wah (Noah)
Le-oh (Liam)
Sacky (Zacky)
Nina (Aunt Stina)
dee (drink)
down (up and down … it’s confusing really. You have to watch where his hands are pointing)
muh (more)
uh-side (outside)
shoo (shoes)
no (“yes” – again, this is tricky)
uh oh
buzzy (fuzzy)
bubee or buzzy (his favorite blanket)
Guc (all animals)
huh-coc (helicopter)
uh-pay (airplane)
nice (usually accompanied with petting Emily’s hair … usually because he’s been mean to her)
at (hat)
day-doo (thank you)
eees (please)
nuss (nose)
eh (ear)

He’s a pretty cute little human at 20 months. He still walks like a drunk and I’m worried about that … when is he going to master walking? His run is hilarious. He ends up going faster but in reality, he just makes his steps tinier and quicker. You just have to see it. It cracks me up every time. And he is a true Daddy’s Boy. This is a first in our family. We have a lot of family photos around the house and so all day long I hear Ray rounding a corner or coming down the stairs yelling and then I see him point at a picture and yell, “Da-dee!!” Sometimes he hears the front door open and he takes a swift intake of air and says, “Huh! Daddy?!” His little heart is broken ten times a day. I need to start taking pictures of Daniel down from the walls … nd maybe we need to start entering and exiting from the back or side door??

Recently, Liam and I have been working on a project for his kindergarten class. It’s an alphabet book that he is making entirely on his own. His teacher sent home very specific instructions on how parents couldn’t “help”. This has been pretty painful for me. A project that I have to watch being done not perfectly?? … and although this started as a “pulling-teeth” exercise, it has become wonderful. Liam talks about it all the time and what needs to get done before it’s time to turn it in. He’s really become conscious of responsibility a little. And I’ve learned how to work with Liam better – giving him ideas, but letting him come up with it on his own. You should see his “proud of me” face. It’s gorgeous. He half smiles and sticks his tongue in his cheek and his eyes are alive with excitement and pride. I love it. I need to catch it on film sometime.

Noah. And there’s my Noah. He’s such a good boy, but lately he’s been talking back. He knows he’s pretty smart. Too smart. So he’s beginning to think that he knows more than everyone. Parents, teachers … everyone. This was a conversation we had on the way home from school the other day:

Noah: Is it bad for boys to take off their shirts and show their top part?
me: not when you’re swimming. But if you’re at school or anywhere else, it’s inappropriate to take off your shirt. I mean, you don’t see mommy walking around in her bathing suit, do you? And you don’t see Daddy walking around without his shirt on, right?
Noah: no. Ya know, even when you’re swimming, there are swim shirts.
me: yeah, in fact, we just got a shirt like that from Aunt Aria for little Ray. I’m excited to use it next time we go to the beach.
Noah: he has a swim shirt?
me: yes
Noah: no, I mean one that you use in the water. It’s made out of different stuff than regular shirts.
me: yes, I know. Ray has one.
Noah: But is it a swimming shirt? One that he can be in the water with?
me: yes. I know what you’re talking about and I’m telling you that Ray has one.
Noah: no, no. It is made from swimming material, like swim trunks.
me: Noah, I know what you’re talking about and yes.
Noah: …(silent for a second) … mommy, can I see it when we get home?

It’s like he felt the need to check up on me. sheesh. This kid. I even got a call home from his school teacher about him “talking back”. So we’ve had several talks about it. I really think he doesn’t know it when he’s doing it. So I’m trying to make him aware.

But … here’s a thought – what if he really is a genius and it’s terribly frustrating for him to talk to everyone around him?

Last night, Daniel and I went in to check on the boys before we went to bed and we found paper next to Noah’s bed with equations all over it. He was doing addition and division last night. But addition into the thousands – like 13,777 + 13,777 = I don’t even know, I’d have to add it … Anyway, he’s a beautiful creature, just like the other two. I’m a lucky mom.

As for me, I know it would make me so happy to clean everything up and I should. I should get up off this darn couch and clean. Yeah … but I’m feeling tired and it’s overcast and I ran 3.22 miles yesterday and I just want to maybe take a power nap before the boys come home from school ….. pretty sure cleaning up is not winning this one.